So, I was sitting outside a few minutes ago, soaking up some of the springtime sun, ((Not too much sun though ... If I got a tan, I'm quite certain I would commit suicide soon after,)) When all of a sudden my lower back started itching.

After I reached back to scratch it absently, I then noticed my upper back was a bit itchy, as well. Then along my shoulder blades. Then my left arm.

I began to realise that as I was soaking up the motherfucking sunshine, I was simultaneously soaking up the venom of a myriad of unknown arachnoid creatures.

That's when I decided I'd had enough of the outdoors, and retreated to the insect free, indoor comfort of my room to type out this blog.

-_-;

But hey, at least my readers get some benefit along with the arachnids, right ...? God, the things I do for you guys! ;_; Anyway ...

Update! Apparently no one gives a shit about Bigfoot, so fuck 'im!

((In case you're confused, that's my way of announcing that I'm about to list all of the updates and changes I've made to mallorymaloney.com. Clever, right? Right.))

One new page added to the Photography section, entitled City Of The Dead. Check it!

I added a bunch of new quotes to the Family's Funny Quotes page. Scroll to the bottom to see the new additions --- You know you want to. O_O

My Facts page is updated again, with new additions to the list of my favourite books.

Since the Site Name/Username Ideas page is ((Statistically)) The most popular page on mallorymaloney.com, I decided it deserved a bit of an update ... So I ended up adding twenty new name ideas. ^^

And lastly, I added two new pieces to the Poems page! *^^* I'm in love the with the one entitled Claimed, just FYI. I almost feel like I shouldn't even take credit for writing it --- It's simply that good! ((Plus it seemed to write itself, which is always stellar. *_*))

Speaking of good --- No. Wait. There's nothing good I feel like sharing at the mo'. T_T I've been trying to come up with something moderately cheerful to blog about all afternoon, but all I can focus on is the fact that my allergies are acting up like a motherfucker.

To name just a few symptoms, my nose is alternately stuffy/runny, my ears are constantly 'popping', my throat is slightly sore, and my eyes are swollen.

Not just the eyelids, BTW. My eyeballs. My actual eyeballs are swollen. Apparently I can't do anything halfway, not even suffer from allergy symptoms. e_e;

Thankfully my Mother went out and bought me a new package of allergy pills, or I'd be slitting wrists left and right --- And not just my own, either. ;_;

So yeah. I've been kinda grumpy lately. -_-; Like, forty seven times more grumpy than normal. Plus, the aforementioned bites I'm sporting all over my body are itchier than Hell.

;She takes a deep, Zen filled breath.; Okay. Positive, calming thoughts, Mallory. Positive fuckin' thoughts. Picture a relaxing scene and shit. Let's see ...

A sunlit park full of grassy sloping hills and lush trees. People sitting in groups of twos and threes on the grass. Sitting silently. Silently and unable to move, staring at each other with expressions of horror and pain permanently frozen onto their faces. Ravens flutter down onto their still shoulders, and begin pecking their eyes out slowly and methodically.

... Ah, that's better. ^_^ I feel much more relaxed now. How 'bout you guys? Feelin' pretty loosey goosey, eh?

What's that ...? No? o_O; What the fuck's wrong with you?! Jeez, you know what, I don't even want to know. I don't want to consider what freaks like you consider normal. Just get out --- Just get right the fuck out, man! =_=

;She stalks off in disgust, shaking her head and mumbling about psychopathic freaks.;