2 December 2009 
Hiya, marshmallow peeps! \m/
Like last week, I'm afraid I don't have much to report in the way of updates. ;_; I've been pretty busy with early Christmas preparation, so I haven't had much time to work on mallorymaloney.com! And, of course, it doesn't help that I'm horrible at multitasking. ><;
I hope you guys don't mind too much! @_@;
The Stupid Signage page got an awesome update, thanks to a submission from my darling friend and Affiliate Kathryn! Go ahead and check out the page --- You will be rewarded with a lolfest. Which is, of course, a festival of laughter. I feel the need to explain this, as 'lolfest' is a particularly difficult to understand acronym infused imaginary word. ;She nods sagely.;
And speaking of Affiliates, I've got another new one! Everyone go and give Carissa's site a visit. *^^* She's got loads of super kawaii content up for grabs, so be sure to check it out!
The Listed At page was updated with two new sites that are now listing mallorymaloney.com: Magical Listings, which is currently sporting an awesome skulltastic layout; And Grave Elegance, which only lists the Mallories of the Internet. o_o ((Translation: Grave Elegance only lists sites which constantly feature dark and/or alternative layouts.))
Now that we've covered the updates, we can get on to the blog segment of this entry --- Which, BTW, I'm über excited about, because just like last week's entry, I've got another magnificent site to share with you all! *_* But before I start plugging the site, I'm going to give a bit of a back story first.
For the longest time, I've always wanted to make my own font. But not any old font, I wanted one that looked exactly like my own handwriting!
However, I've searched in vain on and off over the last few years, looking for a program or site that offered such a service. And sure, I found loads ... But the problem was, they always wanted loads of money for their services.
For example, I stumbled across one site just the other day the other day that charged $145.00 to make your handwriting into a font --- And they charged extra if you wanted any special characters included!
Sure, there were cheaper ones out there, ones that charged as little as $5.00 for a personalised font, but they all seemed to accept nothing but payment via PayPal --- And I'm unable to use PayPal in any way, shape, or form, even if I attempt to do the whole 'You don't need a PayPal account, only a credit card!' method.
This is because they've blacklisted my entire family and I after a 'friend' of my Mum's scammed people online via PayPal about five years ago ... And used our family's computer to do it. The cunt would put up massive lots of expensive children's clothing on eBay, and then after the auction ended and the winning bidder paid her, she wouldn't send them so much as a single sock.
Most of the time, the bitch didn't even have any of the clothing she was selling --- She just stole other people's photographs and placed them in her auctions!
And the reason our accounts were blacklisted because of someone else's crimes ...? Well, when this 'friend' would be over at our house, visiting with my Mum and whatnot, she'd always ask to use our family's computer to 'check her PayPal' and/or 'check her eBay'. Obviously, we didn't know at the time that what she was really doing was fucking people over online and running off with their money.
So needless to say, after seeing my family's IP address popping up occasionally when she logged into her account, PayPal assumed that we were all in on her scams --- That or they assumed that all of our accounts were hers, as well --- And permanently froze every last one of said accounts.
My Dad had over five hundred bucks in his, my Mum had less than a hundred, and I had about ten or twenty dollars in mine. None of us ever got any of our money back from PayPal, and the cunt who started all this didn't get much in the way of punishment.
If anything, my family and I were the ones who were punished, because now whenever we want to buy something online, we have to do it with either a credit card system that's not powered by PayPal, or by sending a money order, a cheque, or cash in the mail.
And of course, not many online shops or eBay sellers accept such payments. In fact, most of them accept nothing other than PayPal --- Especially the eBay sellers based in Asia, which always seem to be the sellers who have the most amazing things for sale!
So, I clearly couldn't buy a handwriting font online if they accepted nothing other than payment via PayPal, and I began to think that unless I was going to save up a hundred and forty five bucks for a font, I wasn't getting one at all.
Now imagine my absolute delight when I stumbled across the magnificent FontCapture.Com, a site that allows you to create your own handwriting font via an automated service. All you do is print out a template, fill it in character by character, scan and upload the template, and after a short wait while it converts the scanned image, you've got the link to download the finished TTF file!
But the best part is that your completed font is completely free of motherfucking charge! O_O Seriously, you don't have to pay a single fucking cent, and the outcome is bloody professional as Hell, in my opinion. I made a quick test font and I always absolutely blown away by how great it looked!
But don't just take my word for it --- Go ahead and test out FontCapture.Com for yourself! ^_~
And if that's not enough electronic enjoyment for one week, I am now going to rant about how ridiculously people spell my name when they're searching for information about me on Google.
Each month I receive a very high number of hits from Google, ((And other popular search engines,)) Solely from people typing in such gems as:
mallorey malloney
mallorey maloney
mallory malloney
mallory malonie
mallory malony
mallory malooney
mallory maloony
malory malloney
malory malloony
malory maloney
malory malony
malory maloony
And my absolute favourite, because its absurdity is truly impressive:
malorymaroony
Sweet Mother of fuck. -_-;
I was never really aware that my name was such a toughie until I started noticing all of the hits I was getting from people typing in these kind of key phrases. Granted, the combination of my first and last name used together is a bit unique, but the names individually are really quite common ... At least this is what I've always thought! Either way, I'm forced to wonder exactly how all of these people have been pronouncing my name in their heads.
;She shudders at the thought of such horrible botchery.; +_+
Oh, and one last thing before I end this entry ... I wanna give a big thank you to everyone who voted for me last week in the AsianPoses.Com 'Claws Challenge'! Thanks to you guys, I came in a tied fifth place with twenty fives votes overall. n_n Pretty good for the only non Asian girl in the contest! Bwahaha ... ^u^
Love you guys! ^_~
OMG, that really sucks about paypal. O_O I don't use the service often, just because I can use a credit card just as easily, but I didn't even think about how a lot of those services are powered by paypal. That's horrible for you all.
That font thing is super awesome though! I've bookmarked it, and I'll get around to trying it eventually. ;D
Also, your name is not that hard to spell. I've never had trouble with it, anyway. <_< I don't know what those people are on.
That sucks that your family can't use paypal. :( I had an old account which got locked with $30 or so & I've never been able to get it back. paypal can be such bastards!!!
I can't wait to see your font!! That sounds really neat. I would make one but I don't particularly like my handwriting. =p
Congrats on 5th place! I thought it was funny that you were the only non-Asian person.
'lolfest' is a nice term to use; I prefer the more politically-incorrect 'lolocaust' though -- I think it sounds more dark and disturbing, not to mention tasteless. It conjures up images of mass-murder by laughter, which is something I associate with on a day-to-day basis in my busy life as a Nazi college kid.
ONE HUNDRED AND FORTY-FIVE QUID JUST TO HAVE YOUR OWN HANDWRITING AS A FONT!? FUCK. THAT. Some sites on the Interwebz are fucking useless; do they not realise they'll never get business by exploiting people like that?? Especially in these hard times! I sound like an adult, I'll stop getting indignant about finances and the current economic state now, before I turn into a businessman or -- worse -- a politician *shudders* And I want to track down that bitch that fucked your family over in the way of PayPal and make her eat her own toes with a death mask around her neck that cannot ever be taken off. Cunt. How DARE she make life difficult for the Maloney household!? Anyone that fucks with your family fucks with me too, and I dearly wish I was nearby to knock her block off -_-' People suck.
I am on my way to fontcapture right now, as I'm intrigued about the handwriting thing! I probably won't make one out of my handwriting, cause my handwriting is rubbish, but it'll be fun to do a test drive and see what I can do with it. I might do my scribbly 'Control' handwriting and see how that works. HOHH! You've gotten me all excited about this; I really am a sad bastard sometimes.
I honestly cannot believe the stupidity of some fuckers searching your name into Google. It's ridiculous that they can't spell a simple name like Mallory Maloney incorrectly (the funniest part is that I just typoed on your name -- imagine if I'd posted the comment, would've looked a right berk!). I hate the way some people spell my name; I'll give you a couple of examples:
-- Kayliegh
-- Kaylee
-- Kylee
-- Kaylie
-- Kaylye
-- Cailie
And some genius variations of my last name:
-- Poojet
-- Pewjit
-- Pujet
-- Pugit
Honestly. The idiocy of some lunatics.
And I voted for you. I wish I could've voted a billion times.
I don't think it's fair that actual Asians are allowed to play.
The first person's entry that had the most votes was crap! It wasn't the best one at all; she obviously just had loads of affies or w/e to vote for her cause she was a minger.
Anywhore, I lurrrve you and you'll always be a winner to me!
-- Kaylee Pewjit ;D
well, that whole business with paypal is horrifying. i don't have a paypal account myself. i dont use their services very often, but when i absolutely need to a friend let's me use theirs. i know that sounds weird, but i feel weird about leaving my credit card info online with them especially after there was some huge security breech there ages ago. maybe you could do that tho, in "emergencies"? have a friend place your order and pay them back? i dunno. dont listen to me.
thanks for the font tip!! i am definitely going to try that fucker out!
Hey Mallory! I'm off to work soon but I thought I'd update you on the shit that appeared to happen on my blog. Turns out some cunt was actually fucking with me and my hostee and it wasn't my hostee in the end. Goddamnit.
Long story short though; I don't want to bother you with that. :P But gosh, the things people do... -_-
Aw well that's a shame because I really do think it's a great movie (and my boyfriend thinks so too... haha!). I don't usually like CG films and all that, but I guess this one just got me.
Ahaha, it was pretty much a dream come true. Just still hoping to meet him one day.
That is full of suck that that family friend of yours was using YOUR computer to do fuckall and rip people off. Do that in your own time, why don't you... stupid, stupid.
It's a shame you're blacklisted, though - it really is. The joys of buying online. There are such cute things you can get off the internet! :(
Nevertheless, a font for that much money is ridiculous when you can make ones for free.... :P No matter how cheap you'll find something free in the end, I guess.
... "malorymaroony"? LMFAO.
I get people coming to my site with the weirdest searches though, I swear. I can't think of one off the top of my head but it's kind of scary how people come to my site typing in "Georgina Luhur". Meh, whatever. :P
Paypal=amazing. I fucking love that service.
It's super craptastic, to see that someone abused it, ruining everything for you because of it :(
People even manage to butcher the simplest names. I've been called "Angy" and "Anjie" mmhmm..
That's one of the worst things someone could do: fuck with your family's money and livelihood. A crime punishable by a slow painful death. (Yeah I'm feeling a little homicidal right now...)
Reply to your comment:
The thing is though, I didn't know the ins and outs and minuscule details of the job until I was done with the program. My last class showed me how corrupt the medical insurance companies are and I didn't want any part of it.
That whole Paypal situation is awful! It's not fair at all. Can you not get your IP changed? :/
I like malory maloony best XD
I tried googleing "Mallory is pretty" but your website didn't come up :)
Reply From Mallory:
Should've been the first result, as far as I'm concerned! ((Only kidding, bwahaha. ^u^))
First I'm sorry that bitch screwed you and your family over. Some people have no morals.
Dude, I've always wanted to make a font out of my horrible handwriting too. Though I was never sure how one would do such a thing. I would have never imagined it would cost so much money. I always assumed people did it through Adobe...I guess that was naive of me. I differently check out that site!
Most of the time people get my name right, but sometimes they fuck up my last name. Its splet "EGAN" but people sometimes spell it like "Eagan", "Eggan", and "Eegan". Seehs.
mallooooryyy maroooonyy. They'd probably make it into a Christmas carol next. LOL.
making your own font would be great because it would have your personal touch but not many people would go far to actually buy a software for that purpose. :(
Eeek! That 'friend' is definitely not going to receive any gifts from Santa this year. I can't have Paypal because I don't have a freaking credit card. Darn... there are just soooo many things on eBay that I want to buy.
thanks for the comment on the layout. I never take months to finish a layout because I know I'll NEVER get it done if take that long. :D Like you, I tend to get fussy over little details but after I realised I can never be satisfied with every changes I make, I decided to just make do with what I have. Hahaha.
Yeah, such shit blew up... The person thankfully has disappeared and my hostee is sort of 'back'. She's studying for exams and whatnot but she said she's going to leave a big explanation blog when she's active again!
I feel bad because I made such a stupid assumption - I had to go out and make a public apology. :)
Hello there! Nice to know you :D Oh and thanks for the birthday wish, you made my day :)
Ooooh thanks for the compliment too :D Yeah I mlove the word RAWR, so I put it on my layout, haha XD I want something more related to Christmas though, but my laziness ruin everything :( I feel to lazy to make a new layout *duh*
Good luck in creating fonts! :D I also want to make fonts using my own handwriting but I don't have a graphic tablet to write on :( It's kinda hard to write using mouse XD
hello! i have noticed she used the same doll too, but i actually got it from another site, so its ok. but i have heard from my other affiliates what troublemakers her and the co-owners of that site are :/
I didn't know you could make a font that looks like your handwriting! SO COOL :D
Thanks again for the comments on my layout, I love Gloomy Bear also. He's so adorable but so violent haha ;)
I like your layout also, black/white/grey layouts are always awesome and I've done a lot of them myself. And your smilies are very cute!
I thought Saw VI was great too..I especially liked the "pound of flesh" trap at the very beginning of the movie. That seriously creeped me out. But the movie didn't end the way I thought it would, so now I can't wait for Saw VII (which I'm assuming there will be)!
Grr, the start of your blog made me want to eat marshmallows. I shall SUE. >:( I kid, I kid. I'm not angry. XD Just craving marshmallows, hmm. :o
YAY, you added the sign XD Now I feel the need to clap. *claps*
That font thingymabob looks aweshum :O I've never actually thought about making a font until now, haha. XD I will be trying that soon, when and if I can get my printer and scanner to work. >_<; I don't know what happened to it, I think it has something to do with me leaving the window open when it was raining, ahaaa... ^^;
ARGH, ALSO, you should SUE that mad bitch! XD If it's possible. I always threaten to sue people but I never mean it seriously. XD But you should, if it's possible. I don't know the 'suing' laws, sadly. ;_;
UM K BAIIII MALORY MAROOOOOONY!!!!!!!!!!!!1111one
PS. What you said about my ex-affie dude being the type who runs a shitty graphic site with badly made graphics? XD You are very much correct, Malory- SORRY, MALLORY! Have a rubber frog! *hands rubber frog*
Sorry, I'm abit loopy tonight. Well I usually am but STIIIIL. XD K BYE
MALLORY
IM SO SORRY
I AM ALIVE!!!
please read my blog.
ive been so busy with school, coursework and the such :(
I HOPE YOU FORGIVE ME
xxxxxxxx
ahah no problem its not that big of a deal. i totally agree with you i have no idea how people like that get affiliates :/ and thankyou :) i love your layout the musical theme is adorable ;)
Holy wow! And I thought my name was hard to remember! I love MalloryMaroony... that made me laugh XD
I've been called several names myself. My list includes names such as:
Sheena
Sanna
Shannah
Shawnah
Shania
Shaniqua
Shoona (ROFL)
Wow that woman should die in a fire. People like her are why I never use Ebay in the first place (other than the fact that I hate the bidding system. if you want it, you should buy it, not fight someone else for it) I had a woman on ebay rip off a bunch of my designs when I was about 14... and the kicker? She REQUESTED the designs for her little girl because she just LOVED my website. Psh!
Have you contacted Ebay multiple times about this issue? I would go as far as to speak to the highest possible executive. No way do you deserve to take bullcrap like that!
BTW, since you like SNES, have you tried emulators yet? They basically run ROM versions of NES and SNES games on a window in your computer. You can download (some) of them (watch out for illegals) online because of the fact that they're not sold or profited from anymore... which makes me wonder WHY some are still illegal. Perhaps they're bringing the oldies back on newer systems? THAT would kick arse. I'm not sure if you could get Mario for that reason... though I have a friend that found Allstars on a website one time.
LOL love the stupid signage. XD
But wow, that thing about Paypal sucks big time!...and even that is an understatement, considering how everyone and everything online makes use of Paypal nowadays.
At least here in Europe we also make use of bank accounts lots, and transferring money online via bank. Well, actually I'm not sure how other countries such as America and Canada do this. I just never met a single person outside of Europe that could easily make use of a bank account. o_O
FontCapture sounds flippin' amazing. I'm gonna check it out. :)
Wow, the fact that you can't use paypal because of your mom's friend sucks beyond belief! Seriously, you being punished for something you didn't even do?! I think it's really wrong of paypal to ban you all with so little proof of you guys being in on it.
That handwriting font page sounds totally awesome! Unfortunately I can't use it since I don't have a scanner. T_T
It's always so much fun seeing what people google to end up on your site! Sometimes I just can't believe the things people google and then end up on my site! So far my name haven't been misspelled though.
I don't think it's that odd that people spell your last name wrong though. I've never heard of anyone named Maloney but you. :)
Oh and about your future home. I think Green Day posters can be incorporated into a adult home. :) I honestly think your room looks more grown up than my home did 3 years ago. And My Little Ponies rock! :D I collect them but I don't have any room for them at the moment.
BTW I was going through my spam files and found a comment from you from my New Moon post (I MUST find a different method of filtering). Thank you for the comment about the cullen baby pic! I definitely feel the same way about the Renesmee character... I wanted to throw my book into a fire when that little brat ripped her way out of Bella and screwed up Jacob for eternity (that poor, beautiful boy...)
It wasn't really the imprinting twist that I hated (hell, I had the same idea for a fanfiction before the book even came out) but GOD did that thing have to be a perfect little center-of-attention focus-whore demon spawn? Give her a freaking flaw for crying out loud! And I so wanted the Volturi to kill her... too bad there wasn't a battle at all. *sigh*
I have serious BD issues... I try to pretend that book never existed. Steph was on some bad stuff when she wrote that.
im back had a greta time ill blog about it soon
Actually your name was so damn cool, i tongue twisted myself on that lol. Gud thing you found a site offering free font of ur handwriting. Might as well check that out.. I wonder how did u kn0w those people search that names in google? I mean where to go?
Added u on twitter dear. Add me back: twitter.com/superjeniffer08
You have pretty eyes, I complimented you, buy me a big present for christmas...
XD
OOH! I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL I GET MY SCANNER FOR CHRISTMAS!! :D
Ha... I remembered your site's URL easily because your name sounded so cool and alliterative. XD
That really sucks about the PayPal thing, and I didn't realize that the one I sent you wasn't free. :/ Have you made any fonts yet?
^ When I get my scanner, Ima do like a billion fonts. :D But really... probably like three or four myself. I don't have many unique ways of writing. And then I'll try to get my family to fill out the template, too. :D
Why not try using Paypal now, your IP address should have changed in the last five years, if not then why not use a proxy (one at my site) and see if you can sign up using that.
Reply From Mallory:
Nah, it wouldn't work. They've blacklisted everything about us, not just our IP. Our names, our home address, our phone numbers, our credit card numbers ... There's zero ways to get around it. Trust me, we've tried many, many times over the years. x_X;
That's quite mean of Paypal. :( It's not your fault! Take them to court and sue them for millions. ;) I don't know if you could actually do that, but it would be nice if you could... :D
And I feel extremely guilty...and I hope that you will forgive me...but I can never remember how to spell Mallory Maloney. :( I'm a terrible speller - I have to use spell check for everything and unfortunately Mallory Maloney does not come up...I think I might have googled "Malory Malloney" once or twice, which isn't too bad. At least not as bad as "malorymaroony" WTF.
I love the allieration in your name by the way. Coolest name EVAR :D
Imma print us off matching Mallory Maroony T-Shirts.
:(
I haven't heard from you for aaaaages!
I miss getting your lolsome comments on my blog!
And I miss your eMails :(
I might send your package off soon! :D
I can't find anything to put in it :(
I was gonna send Billie Joe.
But he didn't fit X__X
I have visted your site a couple of times in the past, but never left a comment. I love the word botchery. It is made of awesome.
I'm going to have to come back; I forgot how much your blog entries made me laugh!
I can't believe PayPal froze all your accounts, that's VERY messed up. I wish there was a way you could contact them, fill them in, and then have them sympathize with you and fix the whole mess.
And have you put up your new font yet? I'm so excited to see it! It would be pretty cool if you're browsing one day and you see your handwriting on someone's website banner or something! I'm also glad you couldn't go with the $145 one anyways, and fount a free one eventually.
I too have to get ready with Christmas stuff!
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