World Famous

I rewrote this story from an old joke! Please don't put it on your site without my permission. ^^; Thanks!

My name is Juniper. I was in a local cafe one afternoon, having coffee with my friend Hina. Everything was going normally, until we got into a bit of an argument --- Hina didn't believe me when I told her I knew absolutely everyone in the world.

'There isn't anyone I haven't met.' I bragged. It was the truth.

Hina laughed. 'Right. Sure. Let me ask you, d'you know Pierre from Simple Plan?'

I nodded. 'Of course. I've known him for years.'

Hina smirked. 'Prove it.'

I whipped out my cellphone from my backpack and dialled Pierre's number. He picked up on the first ring.

'Hi, Pierre! It's me, Juniper. Listen, I have a friend here who doesn't believe me when I say I know you personally --- Can you help me out?'

Pierre said he would. I handed the cellphone to Hina.

'... Hello?' She asked cautiously. She listened for a few minutes, said thank you, sorry for the trouble, I'm a big fan of your music, by the way, goodbye then, and pressed End. She stared at me as she handed my cellphone back.

I smiled triumphantly.

Hina frowned at me. 'That doesn't prove much ... I bet you don't know ... The Prime Minister!'

I just grinned. 'Let's go for a little car ride.'

A few hours later, I pulled up in front of Paul Martin's house. The guards recognised me immediately and let me through the security gates, waving and nodding.

When we got up to Paul's front door, I knocked. One of Paul's maids answered the door, and welcomed me with a hug. 'Juniper! It's been such a long time! Paul's just out on the patio having dinner.'

I nodded to her. 'Thanks, Martha.' I headed out to the back patio. I smiled to Hina, who wasn't saying a word, looking slightly shocked.

When we got out back, Paul shook my hand eagerly and smiled. 'Juniper! How are you? It's been too long.'

I grinned. 'I'm doing pretty good, Paul. Thanks.'

After we conversed for about a half hour, ((And by we, I mean me and Paul. Hina was just sitting there like a dope, stuttering short, one word answers to polite questions and weather observations,)) Then me and Hina headed back out to my car.

As we drove out of Paul's property, Hina seemed to gain some of her doubt back. 'I still don't really believe you, Juniper.'

I turned to her. 'Hina. I. Know. Everyone.'

Hina considered this for a few long moments.

'Well, I bet that you don't know ...' She paused for another moment, and then blurted triumphantly, 'The Pope!'

I smiled at her. 'I think there's a plane we need to catch.'

A few days later, we were in Italy. The Pope was having one of those big events --- You know, where he stands on a balcony and waves at everyone for seemingly no reason?

I told Hina to wait in the crowd, while I headed up to the balcony.

A few moments later, I was there, arm in arm with the Pope, waving at everyone down below. Everything was going fine until all the people started exclaiming and pointing to something in the crowd. I sprinted down the balcony stairs and into the centre of the hubbub. After a few moments, I spotted Hina lying on the ground, looking a little paler than usual. She blinked up at me blearily.

I leaned over, gently grabbing her hand and helping her up. 'Hina! Are you alright ...? What happened?!'

Hina wobbled slightly on her feet, taking a few breaths before answering. 'I'm sorry, Juniper, I couldn't help it --- I passed out!'

I stared at her for a moment before responding. 'What? Why ...?! Oh ...' I paused, mulling this over for a second. 'From the shock of me and the Pope knowing each other, right?' I nodded knowingly.

Hina wobbled slightly on her feet, took a few breaths before answering. 'No ... It wasn't that, exactly...' She said, looking flabbergasted.

'Well, what was it, then?' I persisted, confused.

'Well ...' Hina started, 'You see ... I was standing here, watching you up there on the balcony with the Pope ---Which was shocking enough on its own --- And well ...'

Hina paused, shaking her head slowly. 'Everyone around me --- And I mean everyone --- All started asking each other ...

'Who's that guy standing up there with Juniper?''